LOST  & FOUND

Lost : Pudding's mini.

Found : In Shoulder Play area

Lost : Bottle of red Port - last seen with Frank before Market Rasen game

Found : Silky's Axe (500g hatchet type)

Lost : Kicking Tee after Moule's conversion at Barton

Found : Hornblow can tackle when he wants to

Lost : One pair of Rugby Boots (Jody's Pixie winger ones)

Found : Mankini fans in Skegness

Lost : 5 KG of mixed citrus fruits from Bloody Mary production line

Found : blocking the toilet

Lost : Door from inside Savoy hotel lift.

Found : Lift can't hold four people (thanks Matt Evans)

Lost : Moule's way in Spalding.

Found : Walking down the middle of Main street and then in the wrong pub

Lost : Rowe's grip on the Spalding Pole

Found : We can't sing Karaoke

Lost : Matt Cox's ability to stop sliding before the wall, despite a barrier of bar stools.

Found : Barton are better at naked bowling than Market Rasen

Lost : Matt Evans's ability to drink 2 litres of booze and stay awake

Found : Him asleep in the corner.

Lost : Steeny's sense of direction.

Found : Aliumpa !

Lost : Sixteen hours sleep.

Found : My Migrane

Lost : A few inches from Borat's bits due to the "cold winter weather".

Found : Holly Loves Borat

Lost : Andy Mitchell's Glasses.

Found : Flashing Shot Glasses on the windowsill keep you awake at night

Lost : Lots of money in Flirts.

Found : The "Y" in Cliffy's name

Lost : All other punters in The Litton Tree.

Found : Them all in the Marina Bar

Lost : Libido on the second floor.

Found : and handed in to "the Legend"

Lost : Any chance of convincing my wife Rugby isn't Homoerotic after seeing Matt Bayley's outfit.

Found : It's very hot in a Santa Suit

Lost : Scott Wallis's single status.

Found : He knows when to stop playing the mirror game

Lost : My mind when contemplating putting the boots on for the Barton game.

Found : A Saviour in Dunc who came out of retirement, twice

Lost : Motivation from President's pre-game team talks.

Found : Inspiration from both New Captains

Lost : Contact between tectonic plates in Market Rasen two days after our bowling games.

Found : Mouley only listens when you sing to him

Lost : McGivney's snitch box .

Found : Very few crumbs from JC's cakes

Lost : Goodhead's desire to play on Sunday.

Found : Evan Bloxham  really enjoys playing number eight

Lost : Virginity of five tour Virgins.

Found : Five fantastic new club members

Lost : Waterfall's robot dance rhythm (only after 20 pints).

Found : He can tackle wingers and can score even when wearing green gloves.

Lost : All of Brinner's possessions at some time during the weekend.

Found : Macey is a bigger fund raiser than Bob Geldoff

Lost : Knife for cutting pork pie.

Found : You can't cut pork pie quick enough for the men on the sidelines if you don't have a knife.

Lost : Donkey Photos, whistles, seagull items, flash cards and song sheets.

Found : Rotherham triplets and their pom-poms

Lost : All Ruth's Catholic School inhibitions during Barton's drinking Games.

Found : Gardner can drink lots of beer.

Lost : Two years from my Liver's life expectancy.

Found : Two fantastic Rugby Clubs

In 2007 we went to Scarborough & played Bridlington and Hornsea.

Some memories ; Synchronised banister sliding, JC on fire, Second row & stripy sunburn, “Hospitality” at Bridlington, Fish & Chips with the ASBO youths, Toy tractor rides for £1, Greenday on the Grand’s Grand piano, “Aladdin in Blue” pantomime at Julie’s 40^th , Disinfect your hands before breakfast at the Grand., “Save the Wales” or “Play for Whales” ?, Concierge hunting lost women in the Grand Hotel corridors, The three Belgrano sisters in the Kebab shop, Biffa’s Bridge, Blood Mary production line on the bus – more Tabasco ?, Port, Cheese & Crackers, Casualty theme tune, “Derby, we are Derby, super Derby, ……uhh, what’s next ?”, Blagrove’s tackle on the Rabbit, 40 Jugs of beer at Hornsea, Jody’s birthday, The Hornsea skis, “You’ll be fine, it’s only Absinthe”, Drinking vinegar from the pickled onion jar, Naked Rugby on the South Beach, Only one key per room and breaking down Polly’s door, Service Station Tardis – doctors in the phone box, Signing up for credit cards, Chicken’s off the menu;  so is the Rabbit, Puking in stereo on the Sunday morning, Oh to be a parrot in Yates’s, “Is there any beer in that empty glass ?”, Dale's Disco Dancing, Andy Mitchell’s wallet, Beer by syringe, Dreaming the girls in Rotherham, “Guys ! Guys ! seriously, Guys”, Mick the Driver’s Tom Tom – “at the next junction turn right or left”, Leaving for Bridlington - “where's Kearney ?”, Gary Moule – Captain at Hornsea, handstand drinking, Chasing the nurse on the beach in time to Benny Hill music, “Heartbeat, why do you miss……..”.

Previous Tours have taken in such cultural hotspots as :